You’re engaged. Congratulations! Where do you start? When do you start? The questions start flying before the ring even settles on your finger. People want to know the date, the colors, the hotel situation…

My first thought as a bride-to-be?

Can I just be engaged for, like, four hours first? Please?

It’s all well-intentioned, of course, but the whirlwind begins immediately—and trust me, it doesn’t stop until you wave goodbye at your reception. I quickly found myself spiraling. I didn’t know what to do first… just that I had to do something.

The Google spiral

So I did what any modern woman would do: I asked Google.

And that’s when the real chaos began. Suddenly I was swimming in tabs like:

• “30 Things You’re Probably Forgetting While Planning Your Wedding”
• “10 Things I Regret About My Wedding”
• “The First 5 Things to Do as Soon as You Get Engaged” (subtext: do these within 5 minutes or your wedding will implode)
• “The National Average Cost of a Wedding in 2023 Was $35,000!” (okay, cool cool cool…)

But one message came through loud and clear across every article: Start with a budget. 

Smart. But… how? I’d never planned a wedding. I had no idea what anything should cost.

Maybe you feel the same way. As a May 2025 bride, full-time project manager, and frugal since birth, I’m here to help. Below is a full breakdown of what we actually spent on our wedding—and how we made choices based on what mattered to us.

One more thing before we begin…

You’ll see a lot of articles that say, “Yes, you can spend less than $2K on your entire wedding!” And then suggest things like:

• Invite no one
• Have a friend take pictures on their phone
• Pick weeds from your yard for bouquets
• Serve no food
• Emotionally manipulate friends and family into giving you everything for free

Um… no thanks.

Wedding planning is a constant negotiation between values and budget. What matters most to you and your fiancé? What’s worth the splurge? What traditions actually matter—and which ones are just pressure from Pinterest?

Let’s get into it.

Author’s note: Yes, this is a real wedding budget. Yes, both sets of our parents generously helped with different line items as they were able. I’ve included all of these, since they do amount to the real cost.

Event #1: Open house

We decided to do an open house the day before the wedding for all our friends and family who would be in town. And, selfishly, I planned this event because I didn’t know what I was supposed to do that day. I thought it would be easier to have people come to see me instead of running around trying to make time for everyone else!

Event #2: Rehearsal dinner

Just our immediate family and wedding party at the coffee shop where we had our first date!

Event #3: The wedding

The main event, of course, is the only one you really have to worry about. In total, we had 90 guests. 

So… how did my real wedding budget turn out? Pictures below so you can decide for yourself, but as for me and my now-husband?

Dreamy.

Joyful.

Calm. 

Perfect.